Here I Come...

With a heavy heart. I would say I do not know what it is but that would be a lie, its just so many things that its hard to articulate them all.

How do you punish someone for something that is not their fault? How can you have a whole relationship with someone that is broken? How do you know when to put the glue down and admit that this is too much for you? I mean how do you know? And will you be hurt if, and when someone else comes and finishes what you started? Will you wish that you had stayed and tediously reconstructed this work of art?

There are just so many things that I want to know. I wish that future Monet would come and talk to Present Monet. Just drop a line and let me know that it is going to be alright, just trust.

Trust.

I always believed that God lives in everyone's heart, its just up to us to listen or not. I am trying to listen but sometimes the voice in my head and the voice in my heart get so intermingled that I cannot tell one from another. You cannot make all decisions based solely on feelings so what do you do. Oh and dont even try to bring a physical aspect into it.. Fugghedaboutit!

I just know that there is a Supreme plan for my life and I know I have dreams so vast... I dont want to jeapordize that with bad decisions.

So tonight I am just prayin for clarity, for myself and everyone around me.

***Especially the young men arguing outside of my window. I also pray for sound judgement and safe quarters because I have heard the word "gun" thrown around a few times in their conversation so I'm...

Feeling Some Kinda Way